What Do We Do With an Emotion When It Appears?

Emotions influence the way we think, make decisions, communicate, respond under pressure, and build relationships.

But recognizing what we feel is one thing. Knowing what to do with that emotion is another.

In Dealing with Feeling, Marc Brackett, a professor at Yale University and director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, focuses specifically on emotion regulation. His key message is that the ability to manage emotions is not a fixed personality trait, but a set of skills and strategies that we can learn, practice, and develop throughout our lives.

Published in 2025, the book shows how a better understanding and regulation of emotions can influence the way we make decisions, respond in challenging situations, and build relationships.

Why do I recommend this book?

Because emotions do not remain outside our professional roles.

They come with us into meetings, decisions, conflicts, performance conversations, feedback exchanges, and situations in which we are under pressure.

The question is not whether an emotion will arise, but what we will do with it.

Brackett invites us to create space between emotion and reaction — to better understand what we are feeling, choose an appropriate strategy, and respond in a way that supports what we want to achieve.

For leaders, this is a particularly important capability. The way a leader manages emotions affects not only the leader, but also the quality of communication, relationships, psychological climate, and the behavior of the people around them.

This book is for you if you want to better understand your emotional responses and develop the ability to respond to challenging situations with greater awareness, choice, and self-control.

As you read, reflect:

What happens between what you feel and how you choose to respond?